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When I first started blogging I was obsessed with visiting new blogs. I was also obsessed with growing that Google Connect number. Every day I would visit a new blog, follow them, comment & I would get so excited to find someone who I really like to read & hoped they would follow me back. The whole process was as addicting as a Cadbury egg.
By the beginning of fall I was getting more and more comments every day, close to 30 a post! It was so exciting to see all my hard work finally paying off. But then I lost my blog focus, it just disappeared as quickly as it had come. I quit visiting people & commenting back. I might have even gotten a little too big for my britches, as Theta Mom put it a couple of days ago. I let the 30 comments a post get to my head, I thought I well on my way to being the next Mama Kat or something. 
I was also VERY overwhelmed with writing, a new blog design business, my computer crashing, a husband working 60 hours a week while being a full time grad student & just life in general. I started posting subpar posts or I would do a repost everyday. Then my comments tanked to 5 or less a day.
That’s when I took a break from blogging. When I came back to blogging in November I still was hesitant about whether or not I wanted to be back (you can read all about that in my post Why I’m Burned Out.) I just refused to drive myself insane with the pressure that had been pushing me to blog. As I wrote in November, blogging had become a poorly paid job and my salary was a messy house, microwavable dinners, & an unhappy baby.
But in January, I started to have a new outlook on blogging.
I changed the focus of my blog from ME to OTHERS. I started revisiting bloggers who commented on my blog. I started visiting bloggers who never read my blog. I quit obsessing over that Google Connect Number because it doesn’t mean anything if people aren’t commenting. I started treasuring every comment even if it was 1 or 30.
I paid attention to what people said. I went back & found bloggers that I really liked who had kept reading even in my “too big for my britches faze.” I discovered new bloggers that I really liked & enjoyed reading, regardless of the fact if they read my blog or not. I set certain hours to blog & design so I wasn’t constantly on the computer throughout the day.
I started a blog frog community for Mommy Monologues so I could meet more people in the blogosphere (visit by clicking here: Mommy Monologues Blog Frog Community.) I started writing a Newsletter so that people would know what was going on so I could connect with them via email. I started focusing less about numbers and focusing more on actual readership. I started getting on twitter more so I could connect with people on a deeper level beyond the comment form (hello #wineparty!)
You see, what I had forgotten & had to relearn is:
With the new focus, I’ve been inspired to write fun posts, if I don’t have a good idea for a post one day, then I just don’t write, people will come back when I do have a post. If they don’t then they don’t. But I will appreciate the people who do come over regardless of who hasn’t.
Consider the lessons learned!
{ 16 comments… read them below or add one }
I think this is a great post! I am still very new, and I am constantly learning things from posts like this! Thanks for sharing!
It's funny, I blog for ME. I'm giddy when someone comments and I try to respond. But it really is for me, even when I'm sharing stuff. Of course, then when someone goes "Oh, so, have you tackled the Tesco parking lot again?" and laughs, I'm surprised and try to figure out how they know about my Tesco parking lot fiasco…and then I remember I blogged about it, lol! Yes, I forget I blog! And then people make comments, I get a dear in headlights look for a moment…nice, huh?
My #1 rule – don't post anything I wouldn't want my mother-in-law reading
Followed by Rule #2 – don't post anything that might scar my children for life someday when they realized I blogged about it. Motherhood really is all about not scarring the children for life!
You.are.the.best.:)
Excellent advice! I think most of the time, I'm blogging for the right reasons but I do have those moments when I catch myself getting a little too obsessive over checking my stats and waiting on comments. Thanks for sharing!
These are great tips! Being a newbie blogger you do get caught up in the numbers & comparison game. I keep reminding myself – it's not about that!
This has been my story lately too. Since getting pregnant with #4 spending the time to read and comment let alone write has been well non-existent. Can't wait til I can get back in the groove and follow your advice! Thanks!
I raise my glass to us both finding balance! And if you get there first, will you please share with me how you did it?!!! Because I know I'll be waaay behind! lol
thanks for the insight! – cara from mama kat's
Thanks Cara for coming by!
That's a good plan! I like that!
I am a new blogger, and I write my entries at the end of almost every day. It has become my therapy. I think it helps me to look for good and funny moments in each day.
Great post! I'm struggling to find a balance now because my blog, which I started when I worked from home, is growing and now I"m back to work and have less time then ever. I enjoy it so much and like to get back to everyone that comments to let them now I appreciate their taking the time to say something, but it's hard!
Great post. I'm always glad to see that I'm not the only one feeling that way. If it doesn't come naturally, it's not going to feel right to the readers!
This is helpful insight! I am new to blogging and have realized that it is both addictive and a third full-time job (if you count raising two little ones the first and working full-time the second). I'm blogging because I LOVE to write, but I really want a creative outlet that stays fun and stress-free…hopefully this is possible?
Love this! Glad I found it, new friend!
Great post!