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Lately, I’ve been filling up my personal Facebook feed with all kinds of pictures of the baby. But there haven’t been too many of Lboy on there (or on the blog for that matter.)
Back in November, Lboy flat out asked me to ask for permission before I take his picture. I thought that was a fair request (but I still get some pictures, but if he tells me to stop I do.) He doesn’t know what Facebook is, he doesn’t know what my blog is, but he does know that I have my camera out snapping pictures of him & his sister all the time. He has hit the age where he wants his privacy. He wants to take himself to bed for nap time, he doesn’t want too much help dressing himself, & he enjoys getting to spend some time alone. He’s growing up I suppose.
Lboy’s request got me thinking, what kind of online presence are we building for our children via our blogs? If I had it do all over again, would I have started a “mommy” blog?
And in all fairness, no I probably wouldn’t do things the same. I definitely would have left pictures of the kids off the blog (like that mom who discovered her son’s potty training photos were on a website of a pedophile who liked little boys? True story. Scares me to death.) It really makes me nervous that those are floating around out there on the web never to be reclaimed again. I’m not sure if I would take back any of the stories I wrote, I’m happy that my children will have this as a reference to have an insight into who I was as ME while I was raising them.
I’m glad I wrote about anxieties, about sacrifices & learning about all the good, the bad & the ugly of motherhood, learning how to be a first time mother, and yes, even the humorous side of parenting (like when your child helps you flash an entire department store. Wonderful!)
But, I do not want to be the parent that posts pictures & stories of my child’s potty training success & failures, embarrassing photos, etc because that will always be there. ALWAYS. The thought that runs through my mind is, “Would I want this picture or story of myself on there?” And then I ask, “Would I want this to be my choice to put this online?” And if it’s not something I would want or would choose for myself, then it doesn’t go on the web. It’s not fair to my children, especially not when they are adults.
We do not know what the consequences will be {good or bad} for our children when they become adults after being raised by parents who are very much involved in social media. I’m trying to find the delicate balance between respecting my kids’ privacy (even if they don’t know what that means) & respecting what I would like to do in regards to social media.
I often think “Thank goodness my parents didn’t have Facebook while raising us.” I’ve been able to escape from the things I don’t want people to know about me as a kid & I can remember the good stuff. Will our children have that option? I’m not so sure.
What kind of balance do you feel like you’ve found online as a parent?
I think about this all the time. I don’t have a big audience but it’s on my mind when I know I can google my children’s names & they already have a digital footprint because of me. Good post!
Jackie Most Recent Post…{family weekend}
It’s on my mind all the time too, but I think that as long as parents are aware of protecting the privacy of their kids then that’s the sign of good parenting. It’s the parents who share information like its a free for all that stresses me out!
Thanks for stopping by today!
Kate Most Recent Post…Privacy & Kids
I do post about my kids, put their names out there, talk about Maura a LOT. But Maura will never care about what I’m saying about her. The other three do. They’ll sometimes say “Are you going to put that on the blog?” Only if it’s fun/funny. I won’t post anything personal about them out there. They’re tweens and teens, they don’t want me venting about how teen-ish they’re being on my blog. I’ll post how awesome they are though 😉 But I’m sure people think it’s weird I only post about Maura most of the time.
And I would never ever post a pic of my kid potty training – or probably even take the picture. Those are memories I’d like to forget, lol!
Phoebe Most Recent Post…Motherhood injuries
I was wondering what your take would be on it.
…hit submit before I was done.
I always tell the cute stories or the funny ones. I wouldn’t want the bad stories about me floating all over the web, especially not the ones my parents have to tell. As far as I’m concerned it is no one’s business.
I pretty much like whatever you do, seeing as how you’re the favorite and all, so I’ll follow suit. And your kids are awesome, can’t argue with your results!
Kate Most Recent Post…Privacy & Kids
I do think about this. Any time I post a picture of them or a story on my blog, I try to think to myself “Their future employers will do a web search on them.” I don’t use their real names on my blog or any of my public social media outlets. I only use real names on my personal FB account. I also am very careful to watermark every picture I use of them regardless of the social media outlet. As far as the stories, I’m glad I write them. My blog is my journal of my kids and the way things really are. There are so many stories of my childhood that I will never know. I’m glad my kids will have something to look at when they are grown.
Karen W Most Recent Post…A Toothy Tale
Yes!!! Future employers will definitely do a google search. Or what if they want to run for office?
It reminds me of the woman who wrote that blog post about her son being like Adam Lanza right after the Sandy Hook shooting. This little boy will forever be associated with a mass murderer because her post went viral. What he is supposed to do with that as an adult? I see how she was trying to make a point, but she also has an obligation to keep him & his reputation safe. It rubbed me wrong, I wouldn’t have shared that information about my children. But that’s just me & my parenting style.
Thanks for stopping by!
Kate Most Recent Post…Privacy & Kids
Love this topic. My Jacob was 2 when I started blogging, so no worries about the potty training shots. I’m careful what I put up, and I know Jacob LOVES it when he’s “featured.” He’s always like, “Can you take a picture mom? Is it going on the computer?” LOL When he’s older, he can decide if something is too personal or whatever. This is a really important topic to bring up though.
Kerri Most Recent Post…Featured Today at Mommy Monologues!
I like that idea of making them “featured”–I think Lboy thinks I’m just getting in his face with a track & keeping him from playing with toys! lol
I see posts on Facebook all the time where I’m just flabbergasted that someone would post or write something about their kids that I view to be such a HUGE violation of privacy.
Thanks for stopping by today Kerri!
Kate @ Mommy Monologues Most Recent Post…Myasthenia Gravis + Jewelry Giveaway
There are certain boundaries and limits that I have when it comes to what I put online. Some of the stories that happen are their stories, not mine, so I leave them off.
I agree though, I’m glad our patents didn’t have social media when we were growing up!
Kimberly Most Recent Post…Born Yesterday
I think that’s the best way to approach it, some things belong to the kids & I try to determine the best balance for that.
I grew up in a huge family where nothing was private, so I can only imagine what it would have been like if all my siblings were posting stuff to Facebook. GAH! Would have been awful! lol
Kate @ Mommy Monologues Most Recent Post…Myasthenia Gravis + Jewelry Giveaway