I’ve never claimed to be great in the kitchen. I’ve already revealed to you that I spend a good amount of cooking things that come straight from a box.
I’ve also told you all about how our dishwasher has been out of commission for far too long now. And no, we still haven’t gotten it fixed. And did you know, that when you are accustomed to having a dishwasher & it breaks that it flips you’re entire house upside down? For real, it does.
A few weeks ago, Todd & I were hanging out with some friends and on our way home Todd got a text that a friend was coming over. Of course our kitchen was a wreck from the lovely dishwasher being busted, so we hurried home & I scrambled to get the kitchen in somewhat decent order while Todd picked up Lboy’s mess in the livingroom.
I got all the dishes done, except the cookie sheets. So, I did what all normal people do & I hid them. In the oven. (What? You’ve never done that?)
I told Todd as I did it, “Do NOT let me forget that these pans are in here before I cook supper tomorrow night, otherwise it’s going to be a mess.”
The next day rolls around, I end up going out of town to visit my parents, Todd doesn’t cook the entire week I’m gone, & when I got home it was time for supper. So I preheated the oven, pulled out a frozen pizza or something like that and went about my business.
The oven beeped that it was ready & I opened it up to put in the pizza…..
My oven was on fire!
That’s right. I had completely forgotten to take out those blasted pans. What I didn’t realize was that our dog’s plastic food mat had been stuck to the bottom of one of the pans & it had completely melted & caught fire.
Of course we didn’t have a fire extinguisher. Of course we didn’t have any baking powder to put out the flame. Of course Todd was flipping out. Lboy started crying. Giorgio is barking like mad at the smoke. I’m just standing there knowing that if I bust out laughing Todd will come unglued.
We eventually got the fire out & no it didn’t involve the fire department.
And here’s the kicker.
It doesn’t matter how many times I’ve cleaned the oven. It doesn’t matter how many times I’ve scrubbed & scrubbed.
Every time I heat that baby up, it starts billowing smoke out of the sides, the top, & oh goodness when I open that door black smoke goes everywhere! The house smells like plastic for hours! But we have to eat, so I have to cook in it. Which means, all of our meals taste like plastic. Chicken parm? Yup. Plastic. Pork Chops? Yup Plastic. Pork loin? Yup, you guessed it, plastic.
I have learned that if you dig around to the middle of the piece of meat you’re eating, you might taste actual food & not a burned up dog mat.
So….note to self. Take a few minutes to wash the damn dishes the next time, the oven is not the best place for them.