|March 21, 2009-30 week mark|
I was 3 weeks into grad school when I got a positive pregnancy test. Needless to say, it was not a planned pregnancy. It was more, “oh my gosh, let me stare at this pregnancy test while I pace the bathroom floor & not believe the results” kind of news. I literally took 6 pregnancy tests just to make sure it wasn’t a false positive (you can read all about that here.)
heifer very large pregnant woman walking around on a campus with twiggy, undergrad sorority girls is not fun. For example, I knew I had finally hit that BIG pregnant stage when I would get to a flight of stairs & people would literally start running around me so that they wouldn’t get stuck behind the pregnant woman.
For real. I wish I was exaggerating. One day before I got to the stairs I could hear a guy muttering about how he didn’t want to walk behind me, so I just stepped aside, smiled at him, told him to whisper the next time, and let him go by me. He did turn very red in the face, but he was lucky my hormones weren’t raging & I didn’t
sit on him beat the crap out of him right then & there.
For a long time no one could tell I was pregnant. I didn’t wear maternity clothes until the 7 month mark. It was March when I hit the “Whoa, there’s a pregnant chick in class” stage (I got this a lot in class! Pregnant women are quite an anomaly on a college campus.)
I had just come back from Spring Break. I sat down in class next to my fellow grad students. It was one heck of a walk just to get there. I was out of breath, my hair probably wasn’t fixed, & I just felt miserable.
One of the girls turns to me & says, “Oh my gosh! You finally look pregnant. For the last six and a half months you’ve just looked like you had a beer belly.”
*cricket* *cricket* *cricket* *cricket*
Seriously?! I can’t believe she didn’t see the shock on my face. I wanted to say “Thank you so much for telling the hormonal pregnant woman that she is not the cute, bubbly, glowing pregnant lady. Instead you just told her that she is the pudgy, fat chick who drinks too much at the frat house & it shows in her gut.”
I called my mom after class & told her the story. She died laughing. I died laughing. But it wasn’t really the best thing to say to a hormonal pregnant mess!