I want you all to meet Sara. She tells you down below how we met. So, I won’t tell you the same story twice.
But I will tell you, Sara is bravely & courageously telling her story to us today. It’s a great story to celebrate mother’s day too!!!
Sara’s story is absolutely AMAZING & I want only positive thoughts coming her way! I’d like to give her a BIG round of applause & welcome her to her first blog post ever! I am truly honored to have her here today!
A Different Kind of Mommy
Kate and I met at the University of Arkansas through mutual friends. When she started posting the links to her blog on her Facebook, I began reading…and have been a HUGE fan ever since. When I read Kate’s post about Catelyn and Tyler from Teen Mom, I felt compelled to share my story with her…and now with you.
My name is Sara and I’m a birth mother.
I had a rough transition from graduating college to the “real worldâ€. I made several bad decisions…one with SERIOUS consequences. On August 13th, 2007, my life as I knew it changed forever. I was single, working as a nanny for TERRIBLE children, and really unsure what direction my life was going. On that morning, I never felt more scared ashamed confused as I did when I saw that little pink plus sign. After many tears, phone calls, expletives, I knew exactly how I was going to handle this situation. I am an AVID planner…and told myself the first time I made a “bad decisionâ€, should I get pregnant before I was ready or capable of caring for another life, that child would be adopted by a family who was ready and capable. Now was my time to put my plan into action.
I called an attorney less than 48 hours after the test had been confirmed by the dr. I knew telling my parents was going to be tricky (especially since my unmarried, 18 year old sister had a 10 month old at the time)…so I wanted to have all my proverbial ducks in a row before I broke the news. When I broke the news to my mom, she was very supportive of my decision, as was all my friends & family.
I waited a week to let BD (Baby Daddy) know about the situation. He said “Go to the dr. tomorrow and get it “taken care ofâ€. It’s not really that big of a deal.â€Â Not the reaction I was looking for, but definitely the reaction I expected. I responded with “It’s a really good thing for me and for this baby that you don’t get to make that decision.â€Â I knew at this point, the support I got from my faith, family, and friends was crucial throughout the entire experience.
The one thing that made pregnancy less than completely terrible is my faith that God doesn’t make mistakes…particularly in the baby department. Even though I knew I wasn’t supposed to have a baby right then, there was a reason, bigger than me, I was carrying one. I met that reason at my ultra sound on December 1st, 2006. The adoption attorney selected a couple who had been trying for 5 years to have a child of their own before investigating the adoption route. Before they met me, they had two failed adoptions. I wanted them to feel involved from the very beginning because I knew in my heart, I was carrying their baby. I also thought, by keeping them involved, they would realize this adoption would not end like the others had. I hoped it would allow them to relax and enjoy the process.
Leading up to Biscuit’s (that is what my friends and I called the baby growing inside me) welcome into the world, I had terrible nightmares about him being taken from me and never seeing him again…or knowing he was safe…or a part of a family. I made it known, that I never wanted him to be alone for one single second of his life. That meant I delivered him before an audience. His parents, my mom, the adoption attorney, and what seemed like 15 doctors and nurses were all present when he (finally!) came into the world. Before I would leave the hospital, I had to see him with his family…but, I did not want to hold him. I knew in my head, even though I had made a conscience effort to keep myself separate from him during my pregnancy, it would be so much harder to hold him and have to give him back.  I got the comfort I needed just from seeing him in his mom’s arms, being doted on by his dad. They were the family in that room.
The next day was probably the single worst day of my life. I woke up and the endorphins from child birth had worn off. I was in SO much physical pain and it was time to go home. Leaving that hospital, without Biscuit in my arms, was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I knew I had made the right decision, and to this day, I never question that…but I was really sad leaving that hospital. I was sad for awhile afterwards.
Biscuit turned 4 years old on April 24 this year. I haven’t received any pictures or updates, but I know in my heart he is a happy, healthy, fantastic 4 year old! I still get sad on and around his birthday. However, I take comfort knowing I made the right decision by giving a family a gift they couldn’t have any other way.
On May 26th, 2011, I’m venturing into a different kind of mommy-hood. I am becoming a first time pet owner of my very own Yorkie. His name is Prince Harry. He is seven weeks old this week and 1 lb. 15 oz. I. CAN.NOT.WAIT!!! My experience with Biscuit really taught me how to love, even when it hurts and how to make the right decision, even when it isn’t the easiest. I’m going to have to remember those things when I come home to a chewed up roll of toilet paper or when I’m making Prince Harry sleep in his crate, even though he cries.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I know people who have placed children into adoption due to similar situations to yours. I also have close friends & family who have adopted children for a variety of reasons.
You made a wonderful decision and I’m sure the adoptive family is grateful that you did.
Dana K Most Recent Post…VLCAD Deficiency Update
I think your story is amazing. You are one courageous girl! I think what you did for that family was selfless and wonderful. Thank you for sharing your story.
Such a great post. I can’t imagine the heartbreak. I’m not as strong as you. I took the ‘easy way out’ once. I just wasn’t ready to have a baby. And if I was going to have a baby, I was going to keep it.
Now I have two beautiful girls with my husband and life is damn near perfect.
Enjoy your puppy!!
Wow. What an extraordinary story. Having three kids myself, I applause your courage and your strength to do what you did. What a blessing for the adoptive parents you were. What a blessing for your adopted baby. Enjoy your Yorkie… (FYI, we REALLY have 4 kids… our 1st being our 10-year-old shih tzu!)
oh sweetie…what a brave woman you are. sending you much respect and positivity. thank you for sharing this with us. and welcome to an awesome mommy, prince harry!
I was adopted. And I have only the utmost amount of respect for my birth mother for making such a difficult decision. I’ve no doubt your son will appreciate what you did for him. And what an amazing gift you gave that family.
Thank you for sharing this.
This is the most amazing story ever! You are so brave and I am so proud of you. Sometimes the right thing is the hardest thing. You are right babies are never a mistake and it’s amazing you realized his place in the place. You are an inspirational!! Thanks 🙂
Jessica Plassmeyer Most Recent Post…My Parents Made Me Get a Job
What an amazing story! I was a very young single mom (I know you already know that Kate, lol) and I have such admiration for stories like these. What an amazing gift to be able to give somebody else!
Kimberly Most Recent Post…Shutterfly Photobook Giveaway!
Thank you for sharing you story! You are an amazing example of courage, faith, and hope! You are an amazing mom!! Thank you!
Hannah Most Recent Post…Reality Check
This story isn’t always well received, so I am overwhelmed with the kindness of your comments. Thank you all!!
I think what is most important is that you realized what was best for you, your family and your baby. It was your choice and I agree, it’s a good thing BD wasn’t the one making the decision!! I am positive that adoptive family is forever grateful for the opportunity you gave to them. It was really brave of you to not only do what you did, but tell people about it.
Sara Most Recent Post…Im a Double Agent
What a difficult thing for you to do. But so great for the adoptive parents.
I had friends who couldn’t have a child and they ended up adopting from a teenager who had a baby. It was the greatest day of their life. Thank you for sharing this story and offering me perspective from the other side.
Thank you for having the courage to share your story. I think it is wonderful and veruy brave that you did what you felt was best for your child, you, and the other family. That’s big.
Thank you so much for sharing your story! What a brave & amazing thing you did for that family.
Elena Most Recent Post…Happy Easter!
I think you made an incredibly selfless, brave decision based on love. Good for you. His parents will look on you with love forever.
Kim Most Recent Post…Gardening By The Seed Of Our Pants
What a beautiful and courageous story! I applaud you for choosing to give your baby to someone who wanted him. Thanks you so much for sharing this.
Christan/MamaBearPing Most Recent Post…TMI Or necessary
What a wonderful story! My younger brother and sister are adopted and I am so thankful to have them in my family. My sister was neglected and spent several years in an orphanage before she joined our family. My brother’s birth mother was mature enough and brave enough to realize she wasn’t ready for a child, so he has been with us since he was 7 weeks old. Our family wasn’t complete until we got my brother and sister, and I believe God brought them into this world just for us. Thank you for your bravery in providing a child for another family, and in sharing your story.
You are an amazing and lovely woman. Thank you for sharing your life.
Wow wow wow. This story really hits home for me because one of my very best friends (I’ve known her since age 5) was adopted. About four years ago, she got in touch with her birth parents, who are now married with two other children. It’s just fascinating to see her birth family and to learn all about them.
Thank you for sharing this story.
Wow that is an amazing story. Thanks for sharing…and I know that family could never repay you for the blessing you have given them. It takes a strong person to do what you did.
Natalie Most Recent Post…Its Your Birthday
This is an amazing story! Thank you Sara for sharing such a private part of your life. It’s remarkable that you were able to make such a selfless choice. I made a huge series of bad choices in college and I would like to say that if I would have been able to be selfless like that if I’d found myself in similar circumstance. I don’t know that that’s really true though. I was pretty lost in a fog at that time. Kudos to you Sara, for getting yourself on track and thinking of Biscuit and his adoptive family. That was a really brave choice to make.
Sarah Most Recent Post…Thats Not a Gun- Its Your Finger!
This brings tears to my eyes you brave brave woman!
Having watched a dear friend go through the adoption process, I firmly believe that in some cases it’s the most loving thing you can do for a child. Thank you for sharing your story.
Good luck with your little Yorkie! You’ll be a great mama!
You are a very brave and loving person – (but I already knew that about you!)
You did an amazing thing for someone and thought of everybody except yourself in the process. I respect your decision and I think you should be really proud of yourself. I think its great that you shared your story here. Thank you.
I am so very happy to call you my friend! Love you!!