1. Do not call people before 10 am or after 10 pm.
This was always our rule when we were little. We weren’t supposed to make or receive phone calls from friends before or after these times. To do this day, I get nervous before I call some people even if it’s 9:58 am.
2. Girls do not call boys. They wait for the boy to call them.
I never called a guy. He always had to call me first. I appreciated it (eventually.) And you guessed it, if I have girls, I don’t care, they aren’t calling the boys. Call me old fashioned.
3. Always, always go on a trip on spring break or in the summer.
Every summer or spring break I was in college I went on a trip, from South Padre Island one year to Spain a few years after that. She always said that these were the kind of trips you wouldn’t be able to do once you got married & had kids. The best trip she encouraged me to go on? Mexico. I met Todd there.
4. Be confident! Be yourself!
My mother is a STRONG woman! I am probably over confident thanks to her. 🙂 And in the moments when I had self doubt she was always there to build me back up. Learning to be yourself is a hard, hard lesson to learn. But it was one of the best things I ever figured out!
5. Education gets you places.
My mom had a law degree, but gave up a potentially amazing law career to be a SAHM to 5 kids. But she taught her girls (and boys) the value of education. It wasn’t “Are you going to go to college?” It was “Where are you going to go to college?”
6. Never give up.
Perfect example of this: I was in the 7th grade. I slacked off on a rebound during a basketball game. My mom stood up & yelled across the gym, “Kate! That was yours.” Later, she told me she didn’t want me to give up when the going got hard. To keep fighting! That rule has been applied so many times throughout my life in much more important situations than sports.
7. Treat people with dignity & respect.
I think that one is pretty self-explanatory. And I’ve been known to mess up on this, a lot. But I try really hard to focus on other people & not just myself.
8. God made red tulips & God made yellow tulips. Aka: No one is the same.
I used to complain about my sister being so different than me when we were little. I just didn’t understand why she & I didn’t like the same things. So we would fight. And my mom would always say “God made red tulips & God made yellow tulips. You & Maryann are different, but loved the same.” She taught me that each of us being unique is what is so wonderful about us all.
9. Marriage & Child-rearing are hard. But worth it!
My mom definitely told no lies on these two. There were no surprises when I got married or when I had Lboy. I knew exactly what to expect!
10. Hard work will get you where you want to be…that and a lot of prayer!
Being a mom, a wife, & finding time to be myself are all very hard things to do. They would be virtually impossible without this last lesson.
A HUGE Thanks to Mama Kat for putting my post “My Neighbor Tommy” in her newsletter this week as one of her favorite posts from last week’s writing prompts! This was an extremely special post about a very special person. To have it recognized by Mama Kat was the icing on the cake!
Great list of things your mom taught you! My favorite is "god made red tulips and god made yellow tulips." My sister and I were always so different and this would have helped us when we were little to understand why we were different and that it was okay. And I liked how your mom asked "where are you going to college" instead of "are you going". And you met your husband in Mexico, how sweet.
All wonderful lessons!! I'm making a mental note to teach these to my tot… because my mom taught me them too. Moms rule!!
I think I learned something. 🙂
Oh and that one about marriage and child raising being hard….well, I don't think mom's are capable of expressing just how hard it truly is. Cause mom tried, but what I prepared for should've been multiplied by 1000!
Love this list! My mom taught me the same things and I still abide by them now. If our phone rings early in the morning or late at night I jump. I also never called a boy first.
Your mom is a smart woman! 😉
Love this list! My mom taught me the same things and I still abide by them now. If our phone rings early in the morning or late at night I jump. I also never called a boy first.
Your mom is a smart woman! 😉
I think I learned something. 🙂
Oh and that one about marriage and child raising being hard….well, I don't think mom's are capable of expressing just how hard it truly is. Cause mom tried, but what I prepared for should've been multiplied by 1000!
awwwwwwwwwwwwwww I LOooooVE THEM!Especially the gummy smile one! There’s teeth breaking thgrouh the top now. Hence why it’s sooo crucial to get these type of pics while you can!
All wonderful lessons!! I'm making a mental note to teach these to my tot… because my mom taught me them too. Moms rule!!
Great list of things your mom taught you! My favorite is "god made red tulips and god made yellow tulips." My sister and I were always so different and this would have helped us when we were little to understand why we were different and that it was okay. And I liked how your mom asked "where are you going to college" instead of "are you going". And you met your husband in Mexico, how sweet.
Your mom sounds just great. I definitely agree with #2 but I learned it so late. It was put to good use for my husband, though. And I wish I had been encouraged to go on spring break. I didn't have enough vacations in my life and am just now trying to make up for it.
What a great list about your mom! She taught you some fantastic lessons. Love #3 – so very true! I'm so grateful for all the trips I had while I was young.
My mom taught me many of the same things. I also never call anyone after 9pm because I hear my moms voice ringing in my ears.
Love this post.
My mom (and dad) emphasized points one and two! The only time point two was REALLY frustrating was in high school when I needed to call a male friend to study. They kept insisting girls don't call boys. Context!
Your mom was a very wise woman. And I realize that I have the 10 pm deadline fixed in my mind too!
Visiting from Mama Kats.
How funny! I was NEVER allowed to call boys either. And the whole 10 AM/10PM thing—that was totally our rule too! I get so annoyed when people call (or even text) after 10PM (mostly because I'm usually in bed).
Great post! A lot over very steadfast advice!
stopped by from mama kat's
I LOVE this list… my very favorite is #1… oh, and #2. And #10!!! What a great mom you must have.
Love this!! These are all things my mother taught me too 🙂
Great list! Your parents sound like awesome people. 🙂
On the phone etiquette, I don't remember a specific time in the morning – I tend to use 8am as a rule of thumb (the start of the business day). But I never call folks after 9pm. And I actually really think about who I'm calling after 8pm. There are times since the girls were born that I'm in bed shortly after they are! 🙂
I don't think I commented on your Neighbor post, but I really enjoyed it. It brought a tear to my eye, thinking about some of the wonderful folks from from hometown.
Hope you're enjoying some nice weather in your neck of the woods…it's supposed to be great here for the next couple of days…YEA!!!
At our house it was before 9 am and after 9 pm. If my phone rings after nine you better be an immediate family member, or it better be something I need to sit down to hear.
Love it! Our time was 9am/9pm…lord have mercy on the boys who called after 10…
Love this post! Sounds like your mom and mine have a lot in common. I remember receiving a lot of these same lessons…especially the one about calling boys. That was a BIG no-no.
Your mom's a smart lady! I wish I'd had the rule about not calling boys… life would have been much easier! hahaha
Thank you for the wonderful blog comment! I'm now following your blog. I love this post!
Your mom sounds like a pretty smart lady! 🙂
I love the "tulip" quote. Sounds like your Mom has taught you many of the same things my Mom taught me. Found your blog over at Mama Kat's!
Your mother sounds like a wise woman! Loved the one about you and your sister being so different – could have described me and mine!
Aw!! Thanks! Love this post too!!
I love this post.. 2,6, and 7 was taught to me by my grandma.. Its my 1st time to hear the tulip quote and its wonderful <3
I like the tulip quote! Your mom sounds like a great lady. BTW… nobody better call me after 9pm! 😉
ha! I'll keep that in mind…as long as I can keep the time differences straight!
I think it does Kris! I started both my girls on vegegis, and I’ve crammed them down their throats ever since. They love to eat them actually the worst thing in this house to serve them is potatoes, for some reason they both abhor potatoes I don’t get it, they’ll eat brussel sprouts for crying out loud!But then again, maybe Mama Writing Goddesses are just lucky
I'm glad you enjoyed it! Grandmas are good too, I learned a lot of awesome things from my grandma as well.
THANK YOU!!! And thanks for coming by to read it!
Yeah, it always frustrated me then because I just wanted her to be like me & quit getting on my nerves (and vice versa. lol) But I appreciate the lesson now…seems like maybe she knew what she was talking about? 😉
it better than i ever could. it’s a dobule standard, it’s wrong and it pisses me off. i actually had a guy make the short skirt, she’s asking for it comment to me about another girl once and i gave him the full rant. but he didn’t get it another example, as a senior in high school my girl friends and i wanted to have an all girl backpacking trip (we were experienced backpackers). our parents said no, because it wasn’t safe for girls to go alone . so we tried to compromise and offered to bring some of our guy friends (who our parents knew for years, knew were just friends, and also experienced backpackers). our parents were appalled that we would suggest bringing boys on a backpacking trip. huh?? can’t win for losing.the only solutions i can think of are:- start teaching children early and consistently about non-violent, respectful, conflict resolution (some elementary schools already have this yay!)- and i would add to that curriculum: teaching respect, how to deal with (and not be) a bully, and self-defense, especially for girls. half the problem is girls are raised to believe they’re weak, helpless, victims. start teaching them they’re strong, deserve respect and how to defend themselves, and things will start to change.- while we’re at it, lets add first aid/cpr to the curriculum, because everyone should know that (and i’m on a role )these are evolutionary changes, which means they’re going to take awhile, of course. but it’s worth it. as they learned with other important issues (race, recycling, eating healthy, etc ) teaching the kids is the best way to teach the parents.here’s hoping. and thanks for getting the vday message out and your work on such a important issue. 🙂
Thanks for coming by Dianna!
Good moms are rock don't they?!
Thanks! I think so, but then again I'm biased! lol
Thank you Angela! And I hope that the wedding planning is going great for you! I had such a fun time planning mine!
hahaha! Yes, it was frustrating at the time. And I thought it was not very progressive, turns out I think it actually is progressive in someways because what she was trying to teach me was not to chase after the boys. If they were interested they'd call me, if they weren't then I was better off…hard lesson to learn. But a good one!
Oh no kidding!!! Especially after caller ID was around & a guy would call after 10…oh gosh! My dad would call them back, give them an ear full & then ask to speak to their parents….It was mortifying! I'm glad he did it though, because usually the guys who broke the rules were losers anyways.
It was so annoying when I couldn't call…but I am so glad she never let me!
I'm glad you liked the Neighbor post…Tommy was amazing!
We did have amazing weather today & we should have it tomorrow and through the weekend. We went on a nice little road trip to this cute town about an hour from us. It was a lot of fun!
Sounds like you had a great mom then too!
Thanks!
I really didn't think a lot about this post but it seems to have resonated with quite a few people…I was worried that the no calling boys rule was going to turn people off…apparently…a lot of people had that rule! Maybe it's not that old fashioned!
Thanks for coming by Kimberly!
I wish I was in bed at 10 pm! I stay up too late!!! But if someone calls I'm always like "Don't they know the rule." haha
Thanks for coming by! I hope you liked what you found here!
haha No kidding! They would let me call for school, but other than that the rule was set in stone!
I also wasn't allowed to date until I was 16. That was another hard core rule!
YES! That's how I am…mostly I have a hard time in the mornings because I'm up so early with the kiddo that I have to remind myself that calling at 7:30 is not polite. I will call other moms at like 9ish but not before then. I won't really answer my phone before 10am.
The trips were amazing! I'm so glad she pushed me into those, because when you have kids money gets tight & it just gets impossible to do those sort of things. I'll forever be grateful for the trips!
Yes, but you live in Paris. I know I'm romanticising it and all, but isn't Europe like a permanent vacation?! ha! 🙂 But seriously, you all have so much access to so many wonderful places to see.
Thanks Kimberly! I think so too…granted…I am biased!
Ha! That is true! I was the oldest of 5 & was 10 when the last one was born. So I did get to see a lot of it first hand. I think the hardest thing that I always took for granted was my mom's sacrifice of her law career. When I gave up my place in grad school last fall I called her crying and I asked her "Was I worth it?!" She never could have prepared me for how hard that was going to be!
Yes! It had better be pretty darn important! And pity the boy who called after the phone curfew…and this was before cell phones. So it wasn't like I could sneak a phone call in like my little brother & his girlfriend do.
In the cocaeimptld world we live in, it’s good to find simple solutions.
We were on a study abroad trip to Cuernavaca, MX. Here's my post about some of it: http://www.mommymonologues.com/2010/03/phatness.html
I was pretty much smitten from the moment I laid eyes on him, I just never realized it until much much later! lol
Ha! Mom would just get on the phone, give them the 3rd degree, and then stay on the phone to make sure I told them that it was too late for me to receive calls…
Girlie, those are some GREAT rules to live by. Your mother must be an amazing woman!
Your mom sounds just like my mom! Uncompromising characters. We are lucky to have them in our lives.
And this is why I'm the yellow tulip (we used to argue over who was red.. I wanted to be red.. now I pick my battles) : I call boys!! – something about being told not to made it feel like I was being dangerous..oddly enough I like this feeling.. And when Chase and I first started dating…I would call him AFTER 10:00 / The whole time I was in college I went on ONE spring break trip (to Nashville with Daddy) – I always spent my breaks working.. I like this post, especially #4 When I was scared she would just tell me to "Act like ya own the place." – which has been both practical and fun.. Fun as in – at concerts Kate and I used to go sit in the empty high dollar seats and act like they were ours/ I make my own parking spots when there aren't any/ Momma talked me and Chase into crashing a wedding we weren't invited to at a fancy hotel downtown – we are in several of their wedding photos, and also took home some of their Christmas ornaments… You should do a post about how FUN SHE IS!!
My parents' rule was always 9 AM – 9 PM on the phone. Like you, I still still anxiously waiting for the clock to change to exactly 9 AM before I pick up the phone. Isn't it crazy how childhood habits stay with us? I also freak out if the phone rings after 9 PM. In our house, that only meant bad news.
That is exactly the way it was in my family!! My FIL sometimes calls late at night and it freaks me out each time even though I know he is just calling to chat and catch up with Tom.
We had those same rules too, except for the vacation one–we were not a traveling bunch. I enjoyed reading the lessons your mom taught you–very solid stuff. I really like the one about being yourself and realizing everyone is different.
Stopping by from writer's workshop. Here's links to mine if you get a chance to visit:
http://karenzemek.blogspot.com/2011/03/story-of-love-writers-workshop.html and
http://zemeks.blogspot.com/2011/03/greatest-love-story-ever-writers.html
I never believed my mom when she taught me to wait for boys to call…each of my loser boyfriends I called first…and the winner that became my husband? I let him chase me.
My Mom taught me a lot of those same things as well! Great mind think alike! Miss you guys!
Lol That's awesome!
We miss y'all more! Seriously, like I said in the Chili's post, we are still trying to forgive Spencer for moving you both away from here! Not fair at all!